Five Reasons You Should Date the Wrong Person

We hear it all the time – a marriage is a marathon, not a sprint. The journey you go on together after you tie the knot is a long one. But what about all the running you have to do before you even stand together at the starting line? What about the race that comes before the big one – what about the mad dash that is dating?

Believe it or not, the dating journey can follow the scenic route, too. While the ultimate goal of dating is to find the one and live happily ever after, there’s a lot more to the fairy tale than that. Before you dismay over kissing another frog instead of a handsome prince, here are five reasons to appreciate this step on the journey to your own royal wedding.

1. You’ll get to explore through someone else’s eyes

When life gets busy, it’s really easy to get tunnel vision. We slip into our routines and repeat the same patterns day after day. We stop noticing what makes the place around us special. A date is a great opportunity to break out of your everyday rut and see your city through new eyes. Take a walk or have a picnic in a park, visit that coffee shop you always walk past or get dessert from a place you haven’t been to in years. You might not fall in love with your date, but you just might fall in love – or back in love – with your home.

2. Practice makes perfect

Thirty years ago, your dating pool would have been limited to mutual connections and people you met in your daily life. Fifteen years ago, online dating was just gaining popularity as a way for singles to meet. Today, the dating landscape has changed drastically from the way it looked even a few years ago. The way we view dating and relationships as a society is constantly shifting, and it can be intimidating to jump in with both feet.

Unfortunately, that’s really the only way to do it. At the beginning of your dating journey, there are bound to be misunderstandings. Over time, you’ll learn how to navigate the awkward moments, and the dating game will become easier. You’ll know how to handle those first date jitters, so you’ll be able to spot the one when they’re in front of you. Plus, you’ll learn how to set up a great second date!

3. Not all great connections are romantic

We meet so many wonderful people throughout our lives. The vast majority of those people are not marriage candidates, but they are wonderful nonetheless. If you find that you get along well with someone but you don’t feel a love connection, don’t say goodbye right away. Think about where else this person might fit into your life.

When we put all our energy into searching for true love, we sometimes forget the value of the other relationships in our lives. A good friend will be around to celebrate your success, and they’ll be there to support you through your struggles. The truth is that a great friendship can be just as fulfilling and bring just as much to your life as a romantic partnership.

4. You’ll learn important things about yourself

All of us are chameleons to some degree. Whether we know it or not, we change our behavior to fit the situation we are in. We don’t necessarily act the same way with a group of close friends as we do in a doctor’s office or a work meeting. When you’re on a date with someone new, regardless of whether you feel a spark with that person, you’ve been given the opportunity to learn about who you are as a dater.

Do you prefer lunch in a high-energy barcade, or would you rather eat at a quiet bistro? What about an early morning hike, or a stroll through a museum gallery? This is the perfect time to test the assumptions you’ve made about yourself. If it turns out that you were correct and you truly would rather kick rocks than go to the Louvre, that’s fine. You’ll know more about yourself, and your next first date will be better for it.

5. The right one might have been there all along

Love at first sight is so romantic to imagine, but that’s not the only way love appears. When we put too much pressure on finding the “right” partner, we often get hung up on superficial details. We have a checklist of traits that we hold up to every new relationship, and we are disappointed when it doesn’t measure up. By giving yourself permission to date the “wrong” partner, you are giving a genuine connection the chance to form. It might fall flat, and you might decide that your first instinct was right. On the other hand, you could give it a shot and fall in love with your best friend.