Some refer to intuition as the sixth sense. People often struggle to explain it, and its nature varies from person to person. Since intuition is a subjective experience, learning to rely on it can be difficult. I decided to consult with a professional intuition coach to find out how to harness the power of intuition for my own goals. Read on to find out what I learned.
I recently had the pleasure of chatting with Amanda Hart, the Amazon bestselling author of “Sue Me”, her story of overcoming incredible adversity and learning to trust her gut along the way. We talked on my podcast about her background and what it’s like to coach others to trust themselves.
I got to experience intuitive coaching from Amanda, something entirely new for me. I’ve spoken to many coaches, but delving into pure intuition and holistic practices was a whole different ball game. My mind was buzzing with questions, and the thrill of being coached instead of being the coach was exhilarating.
What Amanda’s Journey Taught Me
In “Sue Me!,” Amanda shares how her own negative mindset influenced the ups and downs in her life. She realized that the patterns in her adult relationships resembled the volatile home where she grew up. Her image of herself was still the small girl trying to make it through a difficult and confusing childhood.
When she allowed this scared little girl to guide her choices, things got messy with challenging situations, like money problems and tricky relationships. The negative conditioning she’d received during childhood still guided her thoughts. It was only when Amanda began to tap back into the intuition she’d learned to ignore that she was able to break her old patterns and rely on her gut.
Amanda shared with me that when she fully embraced her own intuition, it was like a fog lifted. She had clarity like never before. With her gut instincts as her guide, she began to turn her life around. At every turn, she saw great opportunities to become a more grounded and attuned version of herself. During this time, she left behind a violent past, overcame fear, and embraced a more joyful and grounded way of living.
Her book reads like a fairy tale, a real-life princess story. Amanda put her focus and energy into finding an authentic connection that would transform her life, and it worked. But what happened next surprised even her. She ended up dating a famous actor, and their first date was to Prince Andrew and Sarah Ferguson’s pre-wedding ball.
Amanda had manifested an extraordinary time with incredible people who helped her feel like a princess. This experience boosted her self-respect and self-love to a whole new level. Feeling like Cinderella gave her the confidence to be bold and live life authentically. Even though their relationship wasn’t destined to be forever, the experiences she had during their time together were life-changing. Her intuition had led her to exactly what she needed for that time in her life.
The key message of Amanda’s book is clear: there’s no need to wait for the perfect time because there isn’t one. Her story is about not letting her own limiting beliefs hold her back. The book teaches the importance of honing intuition. It teaches us to be mindful of our self-image because it shapes what we attract. It tells us we can influence our destiny by listening to our gut, even if life turns out differently from what we expected.
As a matchmaker and relationship coach, I’ve steered many on the path to finding compatible partners. Perhaps surprisingly, the most significant part of my work isn’t finding relationships; it’s about supporting clients in their personal growth. I help build their confidence for fearless dating and work on improving their communication and self-awareness for being excellent partners.
Are We Born With Intuition?
People say we’re all born with intuition, that gut feeling guiding us. Yet, as we go through life, we tend to let external factors diminish our inner compass. Many of us don’t learn how to nurture this fundamental human sense; instead, we often shut it down, giving preference to logic or more predictable methods. External influences often take over, guiding our judgment in different directions. Interestingly, while we might see things clearly in others’ lives, when it comes to tapping into our own intuition, we shy away from its power.
Curious about why it’s challenging to rely on intuition when picking a life partner, I asked Amanda. She says that making decisions with our own intuition is tough because we’re influenced by the beliefs we already hold about ourselves, regardless of whether those beliefs are true. The actual truth often only becomes apparent when situations play out.
“It is almost like we have rose-colored spectacles on and we make people fit what we believe is right for us,” she goes on to say. In other words, our view of everyone is shaped by our own set of limiting beliefs about ourselves.
For example, someone who struggles with a fear of failure may gravitate towards partners who appear to have their lives perfectly together, avoiding anyone who seems flawed or like they have “baggage”. In doing so, they unwittingly reinforce their belief that being worthy of love means being flawless.
Using Your Gut to Make Smarter Decisions
To use intuition wisely, Amanda suggests aligning with your true nature when making decisions. She says, ‘“When we do make decisions for ourselves we need to take time out to pause and ask ourselves some very honest questions and be prepared for the answers.” Working with a coach can help break through limiting beliefs.
Another thing you can do to become more aligned with your true self is to cultivate healthy habits like meditation, mindfulness, and regular nature walks. These practices are like soul food, nurturing your mind and leading to better decisions through daily routines. According to her, this sets the stage for our intuition to show up.
I loved her response—it affirmed that I’m on the right path. Nature and meditation have been a big part of my daily life lately, and I can attest to their role in helping me to see things more clearly. This should come as no surprise. The American Psychological Association has linked time in nature with reduced stress and improvements in mood, cognition, and self-control.
She gave me the advice to journal after each meditation session and to let the pen flow. This would allow me to see whatever thoughts came up for me without judgment. I must admit this exploration has been fascinating and unexpectedly emotional at times. It has been wonderfully enlightening to incorporate a regular check-in with myself into my routine.
Staying Aligned Through Discomfort
During my next session, I brought up the nagging doubts that bother me—those questions I know the answers to, but I tend to overthink and convince myself otherwise. In this session, I learned that my next task was to learn and focus on intuitively aligning my thoughts and actions with my goals.
Amanda was very clear that we need to be mindful of the messaging we allow to affect us. She encouraged me to remember what I learned from meditation, time in nature, and journaling. When you are in alignment with your true self, she says, messages from your intuition will come through far more clearly, even in challenging times or when you are out of your comfort zone. Amanda explained that this is because we have the skills to understand and interpret these feelings clearly.
Let’s say you’re uneasy because the person you’re dating isn’t reaching out. Being in alignment will help you to tell if it’s a one-time issue or if it’s a pattern of behavior. She reminded me that it’s important to take things slow and not let discomfort become overwhelming. Relationships naturally come with some level of insecurity, so being aligned helps navigate through these important relationship stages and decisions.
Before starting any romantic journey, it’s crucial to understand why being on the right frequency matters. What we emit is what we attract. Often underestimated, self-love plays a vital role. To attract genuine love in relationships and cultivate an authentic love for life, we must first radiate self-love. This journey begins with investing time and energy in ourselves.
My Biggest Takeaway
Amanda taught me a valuable lesson: it’s fine to sit in my own discomfort. Learning to slow down, be comfortable with the uncomfortable, and surrender to what’s happening is a valuable skill. Building your intuition is about being open to seeing what you truly need (versus what you want or think you need.). The power of intuition lies in our ability to surrender, trust, and accept what our deepest self is telling us.
When you’re not making good choices and are out of sync, you’ll find yourself in uncomfortable situations with the same relationship issues, attracting the wrong people. This coaching gave me tools to trust myself and gain confidence in my own relationship, keeping me from falling into sabotage mode.
When doubt creeps in, I’ve learned to take a moment and align myself. Instead of rushing into decisions, I sit with the questions and ask for answers. No need to make things up or force them out. I simply ask, “What’s happening to me right now, and what should I do about it?” Learning to listen and giving myself time to ask, breathe, and listen again has been crucial. Trusting my own intuition is key. Remembering that situations change, I’ve learned to relax, take stock, and not feel the need to fix everything right away.